


Unfinished/Discontinued Works - Work 1

by cactiist



Series: Unfinished and Discontinued works [2]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz, Hamilton - Miranda, Hamilton - Miranda (Broadway Cast) RPF, Original Work, South Park
Genre: (I'm not sure if the word that was used is a slur so I'm tagging it anyways eek), Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Writing, CactiOCs, Canon Disabled Character, Fluff and Angst, I'll be updating it whenever I can with any of my works so-, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Underage, Loki is Actually my cat but she has a tail irl, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Past Relationship(s), Post-Song: Michael in the Bathroom (Be More Chill), Rating May Change, Slurs, South Park sucks, Swearing, Unfinished/Discontinued Works, anyone from the Hamilton Amino..? :eyes:, i guess?, let's discuss !!, was 2017 me a furry ??????
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-11
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:20:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25206871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cactiist/pseuds/cactiist
Summary: [ Adding in "Work 1" because I feel like it's going to go over AO3's chapter limit sometime gah ]Chapters will contain the original intended name of the work if applicable, the fandom, and the rating. In the notes of each chapter, I will state what language it's in (Just in case), any triggers, ships, characters, etc.Hope everyone will enjoy these works, there will be a separate book just for one-shots that I didn't feel like making a separate book by itself for (If that makes sense..!). Let me know in the comments if I missed any tags or warnings.
Series: Unfinished and Discontinued works [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1826590





	1. South Park - G

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Language: English  
> Warning for the following: Bad writing  
> Character: Craig Tucker  
> Words: 83  
> Year it was written: (Roughly) 2017
> 
> Unfinished and no plans on continuing this at all.

Craig's POV

I stared at the sky for the longest time, feeling like nothing could ever destroy this peace that I got. But then again, who am I kidding?

South Park itself has changed, but in some places it hasn't. If you look closely at some places anyways. ~~We got a~~ The mall was finally built, but I'd say that it would be the second most glamorous place in the entire town, although I'm not so sure what is the official glamorous place.


	2. Loki and Caramel's Adventure - Original Series/Work - G

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Language: English  
> Warning/Triggers: Bad writing, one of the characters doesn't have a tail eek  
> Characters: Loki, Caramel  
> Words: 412  
> Year it was written: January 15th, 2017
> 
> Unfinished because I can't find the rest of the pages... Will be updated when I find them. No current plans to edit this or continue (If I were to make it a part of a series).

In a forest long-forgotten, where all animals lived in peace, near a river, a young cat was born. She had cream-coloured fur, blue eyes, dark brown ears, face, and legs, up until her paws and underbelly, which were snow-white. But, strangely, Loki was born without a tail. This was strange, because normally, all cats of the forest were born with a tail. Loki was upset about this. "Mom, why don't I have a tail like my brothers and sisters?" Loki asked her Mother.

"I don't know, my dear kitten, but let me tell you a story." Loki's Mom responded, beginning the story.

"A long time ago, Lake Shimmer was created and a bird was born. She flaming-red feathers and Ice-blue eyes. To anyone else, she appeared as a Pheonix, but to those that came to her, she appeared as a bird of Wisdom. She would rise from the lake and ask you questions, but only 3. If you answered her questions correctly, the bird of Wisdom would grant you what you wanted the most. No one knows exactly where Lake Shimmer was, but some say that it was located in a magical forest. And that is the tale of the bird of Wisdom."

A year later, Loki set out into the forest thinking about what she was going to do. "Maybe I should go to the Lake Shimmer...", Loki decided, as she climbed a tree to sleep in. That night, Loki had a dream about Lake Shimmer, the bird of wisdom, and finally, that Loki would meet someone to accompany her on her travels. Early the next morning, Loki woke up, feeling rather optimistic about the next few days. Jumping over a river, Loki decided to go to the big field near-by the forest. When Loki arrived, the sight was beautiful. The field was a lush green with flowers and a field nearby.

Suddenly, a tiny voice pipped up behind Loki. "Why hello there! My name is Caramel! What's your name?"

Loki turned around. Right behind her was a white rabbit. "Oh...my name is Loki." Loki responded shyly. "Hi Loki! What are you doing here?" Caramel said, excited. Loki then explained why she didn't have a tail and the old legend. "So I decided to go over here...what's the name of this place anyways?" Loki asked, suddenly curious. "Oh! Well, welcome to the valley of flowers!" Caramel exclaimed, not really answering Loki's question. "Thanks!" Loki replied, feeling a bit lost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate this so much. This is almost (Grammarly autocorrected a few words here and there) *exactly* how I wrote it in 2017, and I wish that 2017 me knew what paragraphs and stuff were and that I could do that for a school assignment... Yes, this was a school assignment. I hate it even more now.
> 
> Loki is actually my cat, she does have a tail tho. Scream at me on my Tumblr (@cactiist) if you want pictures of her.


	3. [Draft!] Chapter 1: New York City - Hamilton - G

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Language: English  
> Warnings/Triggers: N/A  
> Character: Philip Hamilton  
> Words: 71  
> Year written: Unknown (Probably 2017-2018?)
> 
> Chapter Title in case it's too long: [Draft!] Chapter 1: New York City - Hamilton - G
> 
> Unfinished - The official version of this is the next chapter; This is a draft that I never bothered to continue but instead rewrote.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm reluctantly posting this... More about why on the bottom notes..

Philip Hamilton’s POV

Philip sighed as he opened the door to his new apartment, his baggage sitting in the hallway behind him. After several hours of travelling and stressing, the 28-year-old man would finally have a moment to himself, in his own apartment, and hopefully without stressing out any more than he had to. Hopefully.

He fumbled with the keys for a few minutes, finally getting the right one and open

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, as we all know, (Date that I'm writing this on is July 11th, 2020) the Hamilton fandom and the play/musical itself is getting involved in *some* sort of drama because of the BLM movement and what's going on in the world around us right now.
> 
> I want to make one thing clear: I am no longer in the Hamilton fandom. I don't want to be approached about it and get drama and dumb stuff thrown in my face. I am posting whatever Hamilton fics I made on here because I liked how I wrote them (Or in some cases, didn't) and wanted to as a way to remember, in a way. Any comments about the current drama and questions about said drama will be deleted. I am posting this on the other Hamilton chapters in this work if I upload them today as well.
> 
> If you recognize this fic from the Hamilton Amino, that's because I originally wrote and posted it there! I have the hand-written copies that I made of Chapter 1 and maybe Chapter 2, that's all I have from it. If you know of the fic, and would like to send me screenshots of it (If it's still posted, I *really* doubt it isn't anymore...), please do on Tumblr or on my Instagram account (both are @cactiist).
> 
> That's all!  
> \- Michael


	4. Chapter 1: New York City - Hamilton - G

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Language: English  
> Warnings/Triggers: N/A (Probably?)  
> Character: Philip Hamilton  
> Words: 232  
> Year written: Unknown (Probably 2017-2018?)
> 
> Unfinished, no plans of continuing this. Might be missing a chapter so I'm not sure if I'll add on with that or not...

Philip Hamilton

Philip sighed as he opened the door to his new apartment, his baggage sitting in the hallway behind him. After several hours of travelling and stressing, the 28-year-old man would finally have a moment to himself, in his own apartment, and hopefully without stressing out any more than he had to. Hopefully.

He fumbled with the keys for a few minutes, finally getting the right one and opening the door. The apartment was actually really well done, unlike the dorms at the colleges in which he stayed at for 3-4 years each.

Philip shook the thoughts that came with the memories away and focused instead on dragging al of his suitcases into the apartment. After getting them all in the main space, he closed the door and took a quick walk around, noting which was where and what he would have to do to actually make the place more friendly.

The apartment was already furnished. For the most part. It contained two bedrooms, two bathrooms, the kitchen and dining room, a living room, and an office, which Philip would probably be using as either its original purpose or as a closet or storage room, he wasn’t sure yet.

The only things that it lacked were the sheets, pillows, and pillowcases for the bed, decoration for the apartment, and towels, face cloths, soap, shampoo, conditioner, and toilet paper for the bathrooms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, as we all know, (Date that I'm writing this on is July 11th, 2020) the Hamilton fandom and the play/musical itself is getting involved in *some* sort of drama because of the BLM movement and what's going on in the world around us right now.
> 
> I want to make one thing clear: I am no longer in the Hamilton fandom. I don't want to be approached about it and get drama and dumb stuff thrown in my face. I am posting whatever Hamilton fics I made on here because I liked how I wrote them (Or in some cases, didn't) and wanted to as a way to remember, in a way. Any comments about the current drama and questions about said drama will be deleted.
> 
> If you recognize this fic from the Hamilton Amino, that's because I originally wrote and posted it there! I have the hand-written copies that I made of Chapter 1 and its draft, that's all I have from it. If you know of the fic, and would like to send me screenshots of it (If it's still posted, I *really* doubt it isn't anymore...), please do on Tumblr or on my Instagram account (both are @cactiist).
> 
> That's all!  
> \- Michael


	5. Moving on (Creek) - South Park - T

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Language: English  
> Warnings/Triggers: Implied/Referenced Underage Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Swearing, Slur (I think sl/t is a slur but I'm not sure so I'm tagging either way), Implied Self-Harm, Caps Lock  
> Characters: Craig Tucker, Kenny McCormick (Mentioned), Tweek Tweak (Mentioned)  
> Words: 698  
> Date Written: March 20th, 2018
> 
> This chapter is finished, but I have no plans of continuing the story. Rating has been updated due to Warnings/Triggers (Though it's South Park, so what else did you expect lmfao).

Craig’s POV 

When I said that I had no interest and would stay away from girls period, I meant it. Boys on the other hand… not so much. Hell, even if a thousand sexy girls tried to ask me out or even try and get me alone, the answer to that would be a simple “No” or “Fuck off”. That’s it. End of story. The only people that I’ve ever had eyes for is Kenny McCormick and Tweek Tweak, whom both just happen to be boys.

* * *

Kenny McCormick is not really an “average kid”, with him being broke to the max and being named and called a “sex slut” by pretty much the entire school, but he isn’t that bad of a kid. True, he may die randomly only to come back from the dead the next day, or try and seduce you and get you alone all drunk and wasted, but like I said, he isn’t that, that bad. I actually was his boyfriend for a month or two before he ended up cutting it off randomly, saying that he had “found someone else” - while breaking my heart in the process - but it was nice otherwise. After that, I just drifted away for a bit only to get back on my feet when I had set my eyes on a certain clumsy (yet cute) spaz.

* * *

Tweek Tweak isn’t your average teenage boy, and seeing that I had already dated an already “not that average” boy before, it didn’t surprise me that much. Although I still should have known what I was in for, since he constantly twitches and spazzes out randomly at times. He was pretty cute by my standards, with a mixture of royal blue on top to light green on the bottom coloured eyes, the blond hair with multicoloured hair clips in them, a beautiful pale face and the - also - multicoloured bandages that he had on his wrists and his fingers. BAM! Instant me in love again.

When I first talked to him on the first day in grade 7, it was only to find out about something. And he… honestly thought that I was going to hurt him or something. Besides Eric Cartman beating the shit out of the poor kid, I thought that He had an easy life, no worries or anything. He doesn’t, apparently, and even I should have noticed that, as he gets way too freaked out about everyday things, and exclaiming things such as “ACK! TOO MUCH PRESSURE!!” or “THE UNDERPANTS GNOMES ARE GOING TO GET ME, MAN!!”.

Later on that year, when we were both in grade 7, he moved. I went to go over to his house to ask him out on a date (after finally picking up the courage to do so), only to find out that they weren’t in the house anymore.

There was a ‘sold out’ sign, taunting me and reminding me that I was too late, and there was no furniture, or anything in the house. I sat down on the front steps, feeling mixed emotions as well as a bunch of questions that arose in my head.

* * *

Later on, when I was in grade 9, South Park went over some changes, and they were pretty big. They built a high school which we now all went to, finally re-built the new mall that we were supposed to have when I was 10 but for some reason never built, a new Middle school, an Orphanage, as well as some new houses. Now it wasn’t only just one school that gave all the students of South Park an education, but three, which I don’t mind, because we really need it.

My family later moved into one of the new houses that they had just recently built, not that it did much for me. But I did get a bigger bedroom, which was a bonus.

* * *

There still was no sign of Him coming back, but I didn’t care. I should’ve but I didn’t, er, don’t.

Maybe there’s something wrong with me…? I’m not so sure.

My life may look pretty simple, with me being a huge asshole and in high school, but it honestly really isn’t.


	6. You've Got To Hurt Before You Heal (Rewrite) - BMC - G

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He didn’t bother to contact Jeremy, and apparently, Jeremy had decided to do the same. Well, except for earlier today, with him coming over to Michael’s house and apologizing before saying that he was going to Christine’s house for a party. Which didn’t end well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Language: English  
> Warnings/Triggers: Panic Attacks, post-"Michael in the Bathroom"  
> Characters: Jeremy Heere, Michael Mell  
> Ships: N/A  
> Word Count: 2345  
> Date Written/Posted: August 3rd, 2020  
> Chapter Name: You've Got To Hurt Before You Heal (Rewrite) - BMC - G
> 
> I don't want to reread this chapter to check for any warnings or triggers for a few reasons that I'd rather not share publicly but if you want to drop anything for me to add in the comments, that'd be really appreciated :') I have no plans on continuing this, sorry to the guy who commented on the OG fic and wanting a new chapter to see Jeremy's side of things,,

Admittedly, Michael had absolutely no clue or even the faintest of an idea (though one was starting to form in his head) what went wrong these past months. He honestly didn't. That fact hurt more then he thought it would. It wormed into his heart as a pang of anxiety hit him, making his chest all tight and his breathing shallow.

He took a deep breath, and let it out slowly, shifting his legs under the covers so that they wouldn’t fall asleep on him. Looking around his room from his spot on his bed, he swallowed thickly, trying to identify any of the items that he could see in the dim lighting as a way to ground himself before the panic fully hit him. There was a small blue light emitting from what he knew was his laptop on his desk beside his bed, his bookcase that held many memories and souvenirs and books beside his T.V. on the wall, and… A small light coming from his bathroom because of the streetlight in front of his neighbour’s house that was casting it’s light through the small window nearby the ceiling onto the bathroom tiles.  
  
Michael focused on his breathing again. It was better, not as shallow as before, which was perhaps a good thing. He shifted again on the mattress of his bed, and laid down on his back, looking up at the ceiling and trying to think.  
  
Maybe one of the reasons _why_ exactly the past few months had gone wrong was because of the following events: “The Squipcident” and the school play. While yes those events had happened, it didn’t feel like they were the direct cause of why everything, especially now, felt wrong, in a way. In fact, it was probably because of the fact that Michael had, yet again, been put in the backseat of the car that was Jeremiah Heere’s life.

A few things that Michael would and could admit right then and there at the moment was that yes, Jeremy has a life. And that’s great! He was happy for the younger boy. He had new friends, went out with Christine a few times, and was starting to adjust to living in this new, but old, but new life. But… every time that Michael had even tried to contact him, there was no response, and if there was, it was always a “Sorry. I have plans :( Maybe some other time?” type of response.

He didn’t bother to contact Jeremy, and apparently, Jeremy had decided to do the same. Well, except for earlier today, with him coming over to Michael’s house and apologizing before saying that he was going to Christine’s house for a party. Which didn’t end well.

Michael shook himself out of his thoughts, reminding himself that Jeremy would be fine and that he didn’t have that tictac anymore. Even if he was still worried, it would be fine. It wasn’t like the start of the school year again, and he wouldn’t be called a “Loser”. Not again. Which, hearing the word still hurt sometimes, but he was getting over it. People always say weird stuff if they’re drunk or under pressure. So it was okay.  
  
His thoughts changed course.

‘Maybe it wasn’t okay? No, no, Jeremy apologized. Just forget about it,’ he thought to himself. He was completely aware that that might not happen anytime soon, but Michael couldn’t bring himself to care as he was suddenly wrapped in a memory that felt _far_ too familiar for him.

_He was back at the Halloween party at Jake's house, in the average-sized bathroom that contained too much white, felt way too pristine and full of clean items and counters and whatnot to even be considered a household bathroom. Fuck, just by standing there it felt like it was a bathroom that belonged to a king, not a simple high school jock like Jakob Dillinger. Er, Jake, whatever._

_He was staring, standing there like an idiot as he looked at Jeremy with narrowed eyes, blocking the way out of the bathroom. He still needed to convince him, tell him more about the dangers in any hopes to maybe change his mind and get rid of the supercomputer in his brain until-_

"Get out of my way, **loser.** " _, Jeremy spat, the word Loser wrapped up and filled with so much venom that a flower could've easily melted from it in under 5 seconds. Michael’s eyes widened and he froze, breaking his calm stance a few seconds later. He let the shorter boy shove him aside, and stared at the shower curtains across the room, not even registering what had happened until the sound of a door slamming knocked him out of his trance. Michael could feel that nauseating, awful, anxiety-filled feeling bubble up in his chest, and he shuddered as the slam echoed throughout the bathroom, a brief thought passing through that the entire party must've heard the sound. Not that they’d even care. Hell, they wouldn’t even care about the teenager in the bathroom, now spiralling into a mind of panic._

_Jeremy had called him a loser. Jeremy Heere, his best friend for 12 entire years... called him a **loser**. _

That memory hurt. It hurt that Jeremy had abandoned him at a stupid Halloween party, it hurt that he had left Michael alone to have one of the worst panic attacks that he had ever experienced in his life, and it definitely hurt that Michael had to leave said party with not one, not two, but three scars that night.

Of course, since then Michael had developed trust issues because of the incident. Anger or not, Jeremy should’ve known what he was saying. Being drunk just removed a filter. It felt wrong to blame it all on anger. Anxiety and Depression aside, he now he had trust issues because of Jeremy. Well, he couldn't say "because" and then shift the blame to Jeremy, mostly because Michael knew that he was under some sort of pressure as well as being under the influence of alcohol, but to Michael, trust was important to him. So Jeremy calling him a loser and deserting him after promising that this year would be okay and that they’d stay a two-player game and just stick together in general just broke all of that trust for Michael.

Their fight was stupid. Idiotic even. It was about the Halloween party, of course, and it was also because Michael was worried about Jeremy just going over to Christine’s house and even worried about him in general. Jeremy had just lashed out in response, saying that Michael shouldn't even be worrying about him because, _"It's none," Jeremy said, his voice shaking as he stared up at Michael. His nose was scrunched up a little, a detail that Michael had most definitely noticed and was wondering how someone managed to be so cute while mad, but then Jeremy continued (and those thoughts vanished, anxiety replacing them), "And I repeat,_ **_none_ ** _of your_ _business on what I do. So stop worrying. I'll be_ **_fine._** ", and then with that, Jeremy turned on his heel, leaving Michael alone to his thoughts in the dimly-lit basement.

Just from thinking about the memory, hot tears started to fall down Michael's face, the tear tracks glistening in the dim light coming from the windows nearby his ceiling. Oh God, did he hate being so emotional at night. Michael normally wasn’t that big of a crier during the day, but during the night it was a completely different story. He didn’t have a mask on his face at night. That was for the day. Where he could just pretend that he was completely okay and that nothing was bugging him.

Michael sat up in his bed, glancing over to where he thought the door was in the limited lighting. Jeremy still wasn't back. He didn't know what to do. His thoughts fired up again.

_’What if Jeremy never came back? What if he decided that he’s better off without me? What if Jeremy found a new best friend? What if Jeremy was currently with some of the popular kids, laughing about how stupid, dumb, and how much of a loser I am? What if Jeremy is in the hospital, possibly dead, and I’m not there to wish him well? Or even apologize about what happened?’_

Michael sighed loudly, a shudder running through him from his lower back to his shoulders from just thinking about what could happen. He buried his hands in his raven-black hair, pulling every minute or so as a small (but shitty, definitely shitty) method to ground himself and bring himself back to reality, rocking a little back and forward. Rocking back and forward always helped, right? His glasses then shifted slightly just a centimetre down his nose, and because of that, all of a sudden, he was struggling to cope with the thoughts in his head.

Everything was so loud now.

He could now clearly hear the crickets chirping outside of the small window above his bed in the basement, their chirps making him more anxious. He heard the shaky and shallow breaths he seemed to be taking every 10 seconds, the sounds aggravating him even more because he didn’t like that. Then there was the slight creaking of the bed as he rocked himself back and forward. It was so much. Too much.

Yet he didn't know what to do. He didn't know what to do, or how to fix it. How could he fix this? The damage was done, Jeremy was probably mad or.. something worse, and Michael couldn't think.

More hot and wet and sticky, so sticky, tears ran down his face at this realization, and his eyes got so warm and it was too much, too much, _too much_. The world started spinning, and he choked out a sob, curling into a fetal position in the middle of his bed, still sitting up as he struggled and struggled to even keep track of all the words in his head, they were all spinning and everything was spinning and loud and he couldn't, he just, couldn't.

Other than the swirling hurricane of words and phrases swirling around his head, a few words stood out the most, including one priority that he couldn't quite place, but somehow he was over by his nightstand, one of his hands hovering, shaking over where his phone was docked and charging, and he unlocked it to the best of his abilities with shaky hands.

Michael opened the messaging app with more tears blurring his vision and falling down his face, selecting the contact that looked like had blue hearts on it, and typed out with his thumb, "please c ome over ?", and pressed SEND.

There. It was done. He let his phone drop onto the nightstand again, not even bothering to return it back to its spot as he crawled back to where he was sitting before, returning to his previous position. He couldn't think.

Michael didn't know how long he had been sitting like this. It felt like hours. It probably wasn't, but when you're in the middle of a panic attack, a hurricane even, sometimes you just can't tell what time it is. Or was.

He was still in the fetal position, curled in on himself as streams of hot tears continued to flow down his cheeks, and his breathing was shallow enough from all the crying to the point where he honest-to-god felt like he was going to faint. Maybe he did and this was all a dream?

Suddenly, two arms were wrapped around his waist from a somewhat awkward position, and he jumped in surprise, which did nothing to help his anxiety as he let a small yelp escape from his lips.

"Shh... it's okay, I’m right here,” a gentle, but reassuring voice spoke softly, and Michael recognized it, a whine turning into a sob coming from him as he tried to speak.

“J-je-jer-”, Michael tried a second time, only to be shushed by the shorter boy,  
  
Jeremy pressed gentle, but slow circles against the small of Michael’s back, and Michael was hoping, just hoping that Jeremy didn’t notice. He just tried to focus on the sound of his voice.  
  
“Just breath.” Jeremy continued, his voice still soft and gentle. “In, two three four, hold, two three four, out, two three four, hold, two three four. Just like that.”

Michael tried to follow the instructions, eventually getting his breathing almost back to normal after a few long minutes, save for the occasional stutter in his breathing.

By then Michael was being held in a comfortable position on Jeremy’s lap, and he could feel Jeremy press his lips against the crown of his head, a small “You're safe." being murmured.

And he believed that.

Roughly 10 minutes later, Michael shifted and got off of Jeremy’s lap and onto his bed nearby his pillows, letting out a small yawn. He was tired from his panic attack and from having to stay up until 2 AM, even if it wasn’t the first time he had managed to stay up this late. He looked over to Jeremy, who was observing him with a worried, but relief-filled look on his face. Or at least that’s what it looked like in the dim lighting of his room. Which, was almost next to no light at all, given the time.

Jeremy crawled over across the bed to Michael’s side but leaving room in case he was getting into Michael’s personal space. “You want me to stay?”, he asked, voice quiet.

Michael nodded, shifting so that he was on his back again and under the covers. “Y-Yeah.”

Jeremy nodded as well, a small smile on his face as he got under the covers next to Michael, facing him and wrapping his arms around the taller boy when he went to cuddle against him.

They fell asleep soon after that, both boys knowing that they’d have things to discuss in the morning, but for now, this was alright.


End file.
